Blog Post 40: Is Trauma at the Root of Type C?

A reader reached out after our recent post on spanking to ask “Could Type C traits be the result of childhood trauma?” In this reader’s case, she was traumatized by one severe act of physical child abuse at a young age, and she wonders if that episode left her feeling powerless and thinking that fighting back was useless. Could she have simply shut down at that point and lost her fight? 

Yes. Interpersonal trauma can certainly be a root factor in developing Type C tendencies. Physical abuse is not the only trauma; sexual and emotional abuse can be factors as well. Trauma does not have to be one isolated act - children who are excessively criticized, held to unrealistic expectations, or are constantly given the message “you’re the problem” are also traumatized. Similarly, children who are continually told “no” by their parents may experience trauma in that their needs are not met; these kids may grow up feeling powerless and unable to fight for what they need.  

It’s important to know that children have an innate tendency not to blame their parents. To make sense of something confusing like abuse, they blame themselves and turn anger inward. They know they are still dependent on parents and need their support, so they create rules in their minds like “I can’t upset anyone,” which leads straight to Type C tendencies. 

If you’re a person who has experienced challenges like these, you can take steps to help move forward and manage Type C traits. These steps can include acknowledging the abuse, recognizing these actions are not OK, and letting go of the blame you’ve turned inward. You may need to continuously remind yourself that you are not to blame, you did nothing to deserve this. Your wants and needs matter. You deserve to voice them even if your mind tells you something else. 

Recognize your autonomy, which means understanding the power to move forward from traumatic events of the past. We may have been a victim then, but we are not now. Take it slow and be kind to yourself. It takes work, but we can change our early self-protective, defensive behaviors in order to command the better treatment we deserve from family members, work colleagues and other people we interact with in our daily lives.