Blog Post 45: Negative Feedback at Work
No one likes negative feedback. But Type C’ers are often particularly sensitive to negative feedback, which they can interpret as disappointing others or letting the team down. They tend to forget that almost everyone has areas in which they can improve.
It’s important for Type C’ers to notice if we’re responding to criticism by obsessively replaying it. Self-abasement never helps us move in a positive direction. Over time it can lead to avoidance of work (like procrastination) OR overdoing it. We have to ask ourselves - is this judgment helping us move forward in some way? Is it helping our health? Is it taking us closer to what matters to us?
Obsessive thinking can be draining and affect productivity. Ruminating about negative feedback can get in the way of our taking care of ourselves. We can ask, is anything gained by thinking about this one more time? Are we coming to any new conclusions that are helpful? Could we instead distract ourselves with something that is cognitively engaging to keep our brains from ruminating and draining energy? For some people, puzzles are a healthy distraction. How about a dance class or some complicated exercise that involves a lot of attention? Or a good conversation with a friend?
Another helpful tool for combating negative feedback is self-compassion. We deserve to treat ourselves with the same kindness and concern that we extend to others. When we don't, we need to notice what happens. Again, does this move us closer to better health, better productivity, better work and personal relationships?
We may end up trying too hard to “fix” the negative feedback. It’s important to be aware of the toll this can take on our bodies, health and relationships. A better approach is to sit with the nervousness of receiving negative feedback, and remind ourselves of the cost of overworking. When we work reasonably, while still making time for self care, time with friends and doing fun things, we are more productive and less likely to burn out.